Sense of Life. Articles in English. I Drank Life to the Lees.
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I Drank Life to the Lees


I have been getting about in a wheel chair for eight years, and yet it is only a year ago that I was able to thank God for the cross He has placed on my shoulders. I am able to thank Him for my whole life.

I come from a broken family. My parents divorced when I was thirteen years old. I remained with my father, since life with him seemed more attractive. I did not like school, and he turned a blind eye to my lack of interest and truancies. So I did what I pleased. At thirteen I embarked on the life of a grown man. I tasted all the pleasures the world had to offer. I drank, took drugs, committed the sin of impurity. I was enslaved to everything that was bad — enslaved to sin. I broke all God’s commandments. Needless to say, I never gave it a thought. God did not exist for me then.

After a few years, I moved in with my mother; but my life did not change much. I was such a spoiled teenager that my mother was at a loss what to do with me. I drank life to the lees. I started fights, drove while drunk. And so it happened.

I was twenty-one then. I was in a car with my brother and the driver. All of us were dead drunk. We had an accident. The driver was killed, my brother lay unconscious in hospital for several months, and I have spent my life in a wheel chair ever since. The first years after the accident were terrible. Unable to come to terms with it all, I raged against my fate. I could not even express my rage in words, since, as a result of the accident, I had lost the power of speech. I regained it only five years ago and I speak indistinctly even now.

Last year I attended a spiritual retreat. It is hard to describe what I experienced there, for it touched my heart, which underwent a great transformation. I, a sinner, an old sinner, was touched by God’s love. My rage and hatred toward the world vanished. I became a new person; in a word, I was converted. Jesus became my Lord and Savior. When I meditate on God’s word, I recognize Someone, Who has always loved me, even when I was a terrible sinner. Now I know that I was loved in a special way even in those moments of my life when I was in the gutter. He lifted me up. He waited for me. He wanted so much for me to accept His love.

Ever since I have come to understand God’s plan for me and realized what is most important in life, I have been able to tell God that I love Him and that I am happy. Of course, there are difficult moments, but I know that He is always with me. I entrust every day to Him. In Him, I find strength and power. He is my friend, and I know He will never desert me. Praise the Lord!

Paul

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The article was published with the permission from "Love One Another!" in June 2016.




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