Caveat Translator - Let the Translator Beware
By William L. Cunningham,
Professor of German at the University of Louisville,
U.S.A.
wlcunn01[at]louisville.edu
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Although
the focus of this article is primarily on translating dramas,
in particular those of the Viennese master Arthur Schnitzler,
a considerable portion of the following observations likewise
applies to translations of short stories and novels. Too
many translations of German dramas, even those in print
from major publishers, as well as university presses, are
virtually, if not totally unworkable on the American stage:
they just do not play well. This defect hobbles British
renditions in particular, i.e. Masterpiece Theatre. No matter
how literally accurate, polished or eloquent, the words
and style are stiltedly unnatural, they do not reflect the
spoken idiom and flow of speech in the United States outside
of the Ivy League, particularly in the Southern and Border
States. Both British and American versions suffer the concomitant
flaw of being simply too wordy, which, on the stage,
is absolutely fatal. Therefore, they are unwieldy and unworkable
for performances. Stilted wordiness alien to the idiom and
flow of normal American speech likewise afflicts translations
of numerous short stories and novels, particularly those
of British origin, such as the Lowe-Porter editions of Thomas
Mann, whose televised versions effectively nullified any
intent to make the works accessible and understandable to
American audiences, historical or political considerations
aside.
Thus any effort at performance translations
should, at the very least, involve the assistance of a colleague
with training and experience on the stage. A background
in directing performances is even better, with the additional
advantage of working with the personnel actually performing
the script, whose own insights can enhance authentic expression
of what a particular character might, or might not say on
stage. Performance considerations likewise need to consider
cultural differences: European, in particular German-speaking,
audiences, are far more accustomed and receptive to lengthy
expository passages and exchanges on stage (even at the
expense of relatively little action) than their American
counterparts, including those with more extensive educational
background. On a more mundane level of performance, questions
such as the number of women on stage also need to be considered,
such as when a play involves American and European academic
life in the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries.
The following observations, suggestions
and caveats result from over twenty years of academic collaboration
with David Palmer, Professor of Theatre Arts at the University
of Louisville. His untimely death in April 2000 occurred
several months before our Schnitzler project finally found
a favorable publisher in Northwestern University Press at
Evanston, Illinois. We had completed scripts of Roundelay
(Reigen); Interlude (Liebelei); the complete Anatol
cycle, with two additional non-canonical scenes;
The Green Cockatoo (Der grüne Cockatoo); Countess
Mitzi (Komtess Mitzi); The Last Masks (Die letzten Masken)
and the first act of Professor Bernhardi. We had
decided not to continue the latter work, due to the presence
of only one woman on stage in the first act, and none in
the subsequent four. Even a reduction to three acts, which
we also considered, would not have resulted in sufficient
action on stage: the cultural differences were simply too
great. Despite the inducement of the role and significance
of the Schools of Law and Medicine at the University of
Louisville, the extensive discussions between medical school
faculty and representatives of the legal, religious, journalistic,
and political professions and institutions would have resulted
in a failure on stage. The response of my colleague to a
draft of the second act crystallized the problem: he simply
fell asleep, to which I was likewise sorely tempted.
Beyond expertise in Theatre Arts, David
Palmer was especially well-qualified for our efforts: as
an undergraduate, he had acted in German language plays
and had subsequently performed leading roles in Schnitzler's
plays, notably Anatol. Therefore, he was especially
well aware of the inherent difficulties in both languages.
Thus he noted that even in Hollywood's version of Classical
Rome, the aristocrats and upper classes affect a British
accent, whereas American idiom is limited to slaves.
That is precisely what we sought to avoid. My colleague
frequently warned that German is far more ornate than American
speech. To avoid loading down a line, we would frequently
transfer a modifier or qualifier, such as ja, doch, schon,
dennoch or wirklich to another line, or even
further. Often we had to break up a sentence into two or
even more parallel clauses or parallel sentences. Sometimes
it simply wasn't possible to include all the flavoring,
such as the second part of the standard South German (with
all due respect to the Austrians, whose dialect is thus
designated) salutation Grüß Gott"Greetings"
doesn't quite catch it all. No matter how well-intentioned,
attempts to translate every single word, however,
may result in passages that just would not play well,
which would be both literally and figuratively stuffy. To
avoid awkward or stilted diction which would just would
not work on stage, we simply had to delete or greatly modify
Schnitzler's text at times. A particular such problem came
with the male characters' frequent, painfully condescending
use of "my child" when addressing women, especially
and throughout Rondelay and Liebelei: we found
no alternative but to excise. As a result of our
efforts, David Palmer directed a successful campus performance
of the former play.
The stress on idiomatic, natural flow of
speech, however, must not lead to oversimplified translations
of words, lines and exchanges. Such attempts "to clean
them up" unduly or excessively, can result in what
might be described as "comic book diction," however
dramatically effective. Like such better-known German writers
such as Thomas Mann, Schnitzler frequently repeats words
or phrases, in differing degrees of variation, which we
at least tried to hint at. A modifier such as one of those
cited above will be added to an initial statement, a series
of incremental assertions with varying modifiers may follow.
The technique is particularly evident in the use of dramatic
"pick-ups," when Character B repeats or slightly
alters a word, phrase or even a sentence just spoken by
Character A. Likewise in an attempt to retain as much of
the German as possible, we used such titles as Herr,
Frau and Fräulein. Otherwise we used German
words very sparingly. Our general principle was to let the
text speak for itself, without the need for program notes
or footnotes in the script. Especially in Roundelay and
Interlude, the most specifically and characteristically
Viennese of Schnitzler's plays, we had the characters themselves
explain references to particular places, or we generalized
such allusions. The Augarten Bridge thus became "A
Bridge over the Danube." Strict adherence to the German
original would require that the Actress' perfume in Roundelay
be reseda or mignonette. But since the plant is scarcely
known in the United States, we substituted jasmine, similarly
strong and erotic, and thus expressive of the Actress. As
far as possible, we tried to follow not only Schnitzler's
wording, but also his punctuation. However ironic that may
be for teachers of the written and spoken word, such non-verbal
aspects are at least as crucial as the text itself in performance,
starting with the well-known so-called pregnant pause.
Several procedural principles became evident
in the course of our working together. We found it misleading
and counterproductive to look at previous translations.
Rather than "look over our shoulders," we attempted
to craft what we thought was an accurate, appropriate, plausible
and playable script. For such an especially intensive collaboration,
it just was not possible to work for only an hour or two
a week, a principle equally applicable to individual, solo
translating as well. It simply takes time to delve into
a script, particularly to "catch" such recurring
words or phrases, as noted above. Working in pre-computer
conditions, I found it useful and timesaving to set up glossaries
for each script to afford greater consistency and strengthen
the scripts. My colleague cautioned that the same rendition
may not work every time, e.g. "Was fällt dir ein?"
Such compiling does, however, help define the possibilities
and provide a basis for further formulations. Dictionaries
with synonyms may also prove useful: however dated, I found
the very first edition of The American Heritage Dictionary
(The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language,
ed. William Morris; American Heritage Publishing Company,
Boston, 1969) particularly helpful, better than more
recent editions as well as other standard dictionaries.
Despite its British idiom and frequently confusing distinctions,
virtually to the point of obscurity, R. B. Farrell's Dictionary
of German Synonyms (Cambridge University Press, Cambridge,
l973) sometimes proved useful in defining basic differences.
While such an extensive collaboration usually isn't possible,
a less intensive approach is also viable. David Palmer and
I were anticipating working on Hour of Recognition
(Stunde des Erkennens) during the summer of 2000. Because
the play struck me as promising and as worth performing
as the rest of our collection, I proceeded on my own, drawing
on the approach and techniques learned from our collaboration.
David's colleague in Theatre Arts, Stephen C. Schultz, shared
my assessment of the drama, graciously looked over the completed
script and pointed out rough, unclear or unworkable passages
. The play was therefore accepted for publication as well.
To cite yet another type of collaboration
and an additional obstacle, I employed the above methodology
to craft a translation of Max Frisch' The Firebugs (Biedermann
und die Brandstifter) for campus performance in April
2003 under the direction of a third colleague in Theatre
Arts, James R. Tompkins. Because he found the standard available
translation totally unworkable on the contemporary American
stage, and, like David Palmer, regarded British idiom as
incomprehensible, he combined my script with a text he had
drafted. Incorporating suggestions from the student performers,
my colleague then developed a performance script with far
greater liberties than we would have even considered in
the Schnitzler plays. For instance, pertinent twentieth-century
American popular songs such as "Smoke Gets in Your
Eyes" largely replace the Chorus of Firemen.
Copyright restrictions on the published
script, however, prevented my name from even being mentioned
in the program for the non-profit performance. Such limitations
apply not only to plays but also to fiction, including text
editions of the foreign language original with footnotes
and vocabulary for American students, as I had found out
while trying to introduce intermediate-level language students
to stories by the 1973 Nobel Laureate Heinrich Böll.
The proprietary holders of such rights are often jealously
restrictive. Thus it is best to consult with legal counsel
familiar with copyright restrictions or to simply avoid
any work published within the last hundred years.
Even after finding a reputable publisher,
however, one needs to be certain that the editing will be
done by someone with at least a minimal background in German.
Northwestern University Press unwittingly hired an assistant
editor, who, it turned out, really didn't understand drama
nor German. Instead the editor seemed intent on reworking
Schnitzler in their own image, disregarding his words and
even punctuation. For instance, his frequent use of ellipsis
was summarily discarded. A number of the suggestions did,
however, cause me to reconsider our work. Only after two
years of working my way through the voluminous comments
and proposed alterations did I learn of the editor's termination.
The result has been a substantial delay in publication:
Caveat translator!
To end with a bow to German literary history
and one of the patron saints of translators, I would strongly
recommend a reading of Martin Luther's Ein Sendbrief
vom Dolmetschen (1530). Polemics aside, he offers striking
insight into the process of translation, down to the details
of working it out. I often found particular comfort and
inspiration in his description of efforts with the Humanistic
scholar Philipp Melanchthon in their translating the Book
of Job (irony unintended):
In Hiob arbeiteten wir also . . . [editorial
ellipsis] dass wir in vier Tagen zuweilen kaum drei Zeilen
fertigen konnten. Lieber, nun es verdeutscht und bereit
ist, kann's ein Jeder lesen und meistern, läuft einer
mit den Augen durch drei, vier Blätter und stösst
nicht einmal an; wird aber nicht gewahr, welche Wacken
und Klötze da gelegen sind, da er jetzt überhin
geht, wie über ein gehobeltes Brett, da wir haben
schwitzen müssen und uns ängstigten, ehe denn
wir welche Wacken und Klötze aus dem Wege räumten,
auf dass man könnte so fein daher gehen. Es ist gut
pflügen, wenn der Acker gereinigt ist; aber den Wald
und die Stöcke ausrotten und den Acker zurichten,
da will Niemand an. Es ist bei der Welt kein Dank zu verdienen.
(An Anthology of German Literature 800
- 1750, ed. Peter Demetz and W. T. H. Jackson; Prentice-Hall,
Englewood Cliffs, NJ, 1968, p. 177)
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